Thursday, March 20, 2014

"You have your hands full...."

In celebration of Spring's arrival, we are having a family movie night tonight where we will watch Frozen. Damien took Payton to see it while it was in theaters. I had absolutely zero interest in sitting in a theater for over an hour while 8 months pregnant, so I stayed home with Mal Mal. Damien brought it home for us on Tuesday, but we told Payton we had to wait until Thursday night to watch. She is beyond thrilled to see it again and I think she's even more excited for me to finally see it.

As we were discussing our plans to go to Target (oh how I love Target!) to get candy and popcorn, Payton said to me, "Mom, you're gonna crap outta your pants when you see this movie!" After she saw my look of astonishment, she continued, "What? I crapped outta my pants when I saw it." Not exactly sure that she understands what she is saying when she said this to me, but I couldn't help myself after the second part. I burst into laughter. Those words coming out of the mouth of my five year old.....sheesh! So, I learned today that I should not ever use the word crap in front of my children, unless I want them saying things like that. I also was reminded that I have very little self-control when it comes to things I think are funny, but I should be reprimanding for. How do you correct a kiddo after you've laughed at what they've said? Ah, one of the most important rules of Parenting 101, don't let them see you laugh. Oops!

So, after the baby girls woke up from nap, we loaded into the van and headed for Target. This is literally only my second Target trip with all three girls in tow. I have discovered that as long as everyone is fed and has a clean diaper/used bathroom, that I can make quick trips with the three of them. As we make our way to the back of the grocery section where the candy is, Mallori was in the seat of the cart, Brooklyn was in her carrier in the basket part, and Payton held on to the side. We stopped and looked at a few things on the way and then we found the candy. There was another guest (I know Target terminology from all Damien's years working for them) on the candy aisle. I saw her glance at me girls, then at me with a smile. Before she left the aisle, she looked at me and said, "You're doing a great job." I responded with "thank you" and she was off to finish her shopping.

After choosing our candy selections, we stopped to look at some clearance merchandise and continued for checkout. By this time, Payton had told me that she needed to potty. Seriously!? So, I took her to the family restroom and waited right outside with my cart and other girls. When she finished, we got in line and the lady from the candy aisle was one person ahead of us. She looks at Payton and says, "You are a good big sister. I saw you helping your Mommy." Payton gave her a bashful, "thank you."

I don't know this lady and it's likely our paths will never cross again, but what a refreshing encounter! I am so used to getting the pity looks and comments like, "you sure have your hands full!" Yes, I am aware that I have my hands full and I don't need you, random stranger, telling me this. My girls were all being quiet when this lady saw us, no one was melting down, we were just having a conversation about movie night candy. However, good behavior from my girls has not stopped those annoying "hands full" comments in the past.

Now, I know the people who make comments like those don't mean any harm, they are most likely even trying to be encouraging, but to a mom who is struggling to grocery shop, drop one child off at school or waiting in line at the post office, those are fighting words. In that moment, we want nothing more than to toss a drink in your face.

So, next time you see a mom out with her kids, tell her that she's doing a great job. Today, from that stranger, it meant the world to me.

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